Who Is Jesus?

I’ve been working on this post for a couple of days, it has been a bit of a struggle. I pulled out “bible lingo to sound spiritual because I want to sound like I know the answer. Then, I removed it because it sound religious and puffed up. Or, I sounded like I’m working hard to convince you that Jesus is more than a historic figure or just another god. I erased it all and started over with this post and decided to share my bible reading experience one morning. Just a regular weekday morning, when I open up my bible with my cup of coffee and enjoy my reading and devotionals. 

When I was finished with my “assigned” reading from my yearly plan, I picked up my devotional books and Gods Promises books, I love ending my reading time with these.

This passage in the gospel of Mark 8: 27-29 shocked me. Jesus wanted to know what people were saying about him and he wanted to know what his disciples were thinking and saying about him. Like in those ancient days, many people are still saying something about Jesus. Good, bad and wrong things.  

 It’s an important question, Who is Jesus to you? You might be surprised at the answers people come up with. Of course I know the answer to that question, Jesus is God, the resurrected savior who rescued my soul, changed my life many years ago and has remained a part of my everyday existence. He is my Savior, Deliverer and Lord. Right here is when another thought was provoked. Is Jesus the Lord of all of my life? It should be evident by what people say about me. And of course then I wondered, who do people say that I am? Is my character shaped by His Word? Does his Holy Spirit traffic through my different relationships and the “different hats” I wear in my life? Do I live my life around who Jesus is? Are His plans my priority? Is His Will my goal? 

Do people see Jesus beyond my nationality? American,  Mexican-American Or am I just a Strong Latina woman? 😀 Do they see that yes I’m Mrs.Greene with Jesus helping me build my house ? In my parenting, did my little children see Jesus in my life, not just hear the “Christianese” but see the evidence of his presence in me? Have my adult kids been able to follow a good example of "Jesus first"? What kind of friend have I been? The best kind is the one who points you to Jesus and walks with you on His narrow path.

I’ve had a wonderful relationship with my sisters, they knew I was born again, one led me to Jesus 40 years ago and then 15 years ago I led my 2 older sisters to salvation and today they rest in his peace. They’ve seen my shortcomings, but I believe they’ve also seen my continuing conversion through the years. 

I have lived my life intentionally conscious of Jesus. When I was 18, I stepped out of religion and accepted Jesus and I wanted the whole world to know who Jesus is. Jesus is the one true Messiah. He came to save the lost, like me, He loves us so much he was willing to give everything to purchase our redemption. 

I love when Jesus knocks at the door of my heart. He knocks often and we sup together, but sometimes, moments with God are electrifying. His word comes alive, more than just comforting words on a page. I'm convicted and challenged, I'm affected by His word and I "check myself." The moment sticks to the walls of my mind and I tell everyone that listens, about these landmarks that Jesus gives .

As you’re about your business, who do you say Jesus is? 

 

Mothers In The Bible: Jobs Wife

                                                          

                                                  

I just finished reading the book of Job in the Old Testament. I read it every year and every year God reveals things to me about him, about me, about me and him and about relationships. I am always amazed at Gods living Word. This year as I began, I asked him to reveal things out of every chapter and to help me to grasp it, apply it and appreciate it. I was stunned by God's view of his son Job. I wondered at the proximity of Satan and the meeting with the “sons of God”. I was amazed by Jobs' vulnerability and I was annoyed by Job's friends, which I had a different view on in previous readings, but the thing that I’m going to focus on in this post is Jobs' wife and Jobs resolve as a husband and priest of his home.

I started to research Jobs' wife, she is another nameless wife in the bible. Then I chose not to since I’m simply giving you a glimpse of what God revealed to me as a fellow wife and mother. this was my take-away in this season.

When I read my bible, especially the Old Testament, I always picture all the unseen details in each story. In Jobs story, my heart went out to Jobs wife also. I imagined their life together. A fruitful couple indeed, and it seems as if those around them were also blessed by their fruitfulness, in business and wealth and with a large family.

Ten kids! Wow! We raised 4 kids and I found myself weary at times. My parents had 9 kids, and raised 8, I know my mother was loaded down with work and exhausted. Job and his wife had raised their 10 kids to be independent with wealth of their own. The bible doesn’t mention grandchildren, but as fruitful as Job and his Mrs. were, I wonder about grandchildren for them. What a beautiful family they must have been and comfy in their wealth. Jobs' wife must have been very happy with her grand family enjoying the benefits that God had bestowed on them. Job was careful to bring his children to God, offering prayers and sacrifices. Being the righteous man that God said he was, it goes without saying that Job as the priest of his home also prayed for his wife and marriage.

As it happens sometimes, a whirlwind of crisis hits a family and they are left with a gaping hole in their lives. Job and his wife, in one moment ALL their kids died. Just like that, this mother had her children ripped out of her life, not to mention the loss of their property. Oh my goodness what pain! In all my years I’ve had pain and loss, but not to this degree. I clearly remember my extreme losses. I can remember what some of my thoughts were like, some of them very dark. The numbness from sudden loss and the inability to keep on living suffocated me at times. Jobs wife had probably not even grasp the graveness of her losses when suddenly her husband is hit with some sort of skin disorder. His strength taken from her, the boils on his body made him completely unaccessible, it must have seemed to her that she had nothing left in her world. Job was in so much pain, mental, emotional and now physical that it took everything he had to keep his thoughts right. Peace and security were ripped right from under them, not just him. How did they survive?

Perhaps Jobs wife was thrust into a deep pit of vile bile. She was submerged into bitterness, anger, unbelief, maybe even hatred. I think that most people read the book of Job and consider what terrible pain and suffering he endured, never considering Jobs wife, the wife of his youth, his life partner. She too felt deep pain and wondered at his patience in the midst of their pain.

Is it a wonder that Jobs wife said in Job 2:9 “Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die.” She too knew who the author of life was. She knew that God was all powerful and could do anything. Why wasn't he doing anything to help them? She understood that God was aware of all that they had lost and her all her emotions were summed up in this one comment to Job. I wonder, did she have anyone to talk to? It seemed that Job was in too much pain, but again, being the righteous conscientious man of God that he was, he must have seen her pain, but it was a time to wait on God, his recorded words demonstrate his own shock and utter confusion as to "why" things happened as they did. Maybe she thought Job didn’t care about her?

At this point Jobs' integrity meant her own recovery, peace and eternal destiny. Maybe she just needed her husband's faithfulness to reach out to her. As a wife of almost 36 years, married to the same man, both of us believing in Christ for our lives and our children's lives, there are times that my husband's stubborn fidelity to Jesus the Saviour of the world, keeps me grounded, even when I go off the deep end because of continuous painful situations. I heard one pastor say it like this in a marriage seminar. “It’s as if your wife is attached to you with a bungee cord and every once in a while she will jump off the cliff and all you can do for your wife is hang on to God's truth.” Stand strong man of God, that is the help she needs from you. Job said to his wife, “You speak as one of the foolish women speak. Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil (disaster)” So much said in these few words. Be still my wife, wait on God, trust him. Let's face the pain.

It’s interesting that we don't hear her voice again. However, From reading the rest of the story of Job, they waited, and it wasn’t waiting without visible agony, but it was with a transparent faith in the God of all creation and God visited Job, I do wonder if his wife was there for that terrible and glorious visitation.

When God healed and restored to Job all his losses back to him, it was to his wife also. My biological clock regarding pregnancy and babies is having a hard time processing this, but regardless, Job and his wife were restored. In his later years he was healthy and strong and it’s very likely that she was too. Their wealth was doubled and they had 7 more sons and 3 beautiful daughters. Through it all, Job worshiped the Blesser rather than the blessings, including his wife and she was blessed.

Mothers in The Bible

Bathsheba

The graphic events of the bible provoke such dramatic reactions from me. After the shock, anger and indignation has settled, I tend to wonder what in the world would I do if I was faced with these things, especially those things that happened to women and mothers. I’ve been reading and rereading my bible for a long time and I’m still moved by these true stories.  My pastor always says “every word in the bible is there for a reason” and so if God stops me or slows me down in these places, I need to pay close attention.

For example

Bathsheba in 2 Samuel 11-12: A quick synopsis. The daughter of a high official in King Davids government, she marries a dedicated military man, Uriah, one of David's mighty men. Bathsheba and Uriah do not have children.We don't know how long they were married before the king takes notice of her. King David decides to take her and sleep with her. She conceived! Then Uriah, her husband, is disposed of by the king. For a very short time she is a widow  because King David marries her. The baby is born, a son! Looks like everything is gonna be ok and they can go on together as a happy family and serve the living God. Then the baby is struck with sickness, her motherhood is tested, 7 days her son lies sick and dies. Then she conceives again!  In total David and Bathsheba had four sons, Solomon was the youngest and chosen as the next king. 

It seems like everything in Bathsheba's life happened so very quickly, like there was no time to process things. She’s embroiled in an extra marital affair with the king?! She finds out she’s pregnant?!!! A baby?! A long awaited baby, but he’s not her husband's child. She keeps everything quiet?! Her husband is killed in battle?! A pregnant widow?! Oh my goodness! A baby in her arms, a beautiful baby boy! Oh what love! I clearly remember the first time I laid eyes on my first born baby, my son, immediately I was inlove and attached to him.Then her baby dies, oh what sorrow. What confusion, what pain. All of this happened to her because King David made a decision after looking at her. He desired her and took her.  I truly hope I’m not sounding like a man hater, I’m not. I love and appreciate the blessing of the men in my life. This post is about reactions to the circumstances of life. (David, despite all his human frailty is considered a hero and mighty man of God. He was a man of faith in the one true God. Davids experiences with God, and Gods protection and parenting over him demonstrates God's incredible love, patience and mercy. It was not that David was good or bad, it was David's heart devotion and unshakable faith in God. Davids life and Psalms give me hope)

Back to Bathsheba. Incredible, how the cycle of life continues and we cannot get caught in the rolling wheel because of bitterness, regret, anger, sorrow and more-life goes on. How was Bathsheba's mind and heart? Only God could help her through all of this and he did. 


Later in 1 Kings 2: 19-23  Bathsheba's son Solomon became king after David. In this episode also,  things happen so quickly. Through selfishness, betrayal and narcissism Solomon's older brother Adonijah tries to take the kingdom. One moment Bathshebas life and her son's life is hanging in the balance, then suddenly her son is on the throne and she is mother of the king. Solomon is barely on the throne when Adonijah approaches his mother. Why did Bathsheba consider his request? She was wary of him. yet did she pity him? Did she think he cared for her son the King? What was the right response? He was her stepson after all, what would it look like to ignore him? Was it carelessness or fear that prompted this mother? Or was it that she knew her son the king would simply do what was needed with this request? 

Things That A Mother Must Remember:

Even in times of victory keep your guard up for the enemy who seeks to steal, kill and destroy you. Even in these moments of “glory”  a vigilant praying stance needs to be firmly practiced. 

Even when the leader, the man in charge is yQueeour son, he is still the one in charge. Be careful to respect the place of his leadership.

Sarahs Journey

Sarah is quite an outstanding character in bible history, yet such a normal almost common woman. I find myself thinking it's wrong for me to see her so human…like me. Wait! I don't want that to sound as if I think I could have worn Sarah's shoes.  It's just that these heroes of the faith seemed supernatural, extraordinary, almost heroic. there's a whole hall of fame in Hebrews 11 dedicated to them...Yet, God let us see their raw, unedited experiences. Desperate ugly defeating failure and pain that did not destroy them.

The account of Sarah lies in 11 chapters of Genesis. I'll share only a few the things that have jumped out and arrested my attention about Sarah:

Gen 12: 

-Sarah went with Abraham when God called him to a separate, different life, a fruitful life. I wondered how that conversation took place? They must have been married for sometime if Abraham was 75 years old! What an incredible relationship this couple must have had! Abraham must have been an amazing talker to get her to pick up and leave everything behind. They went with nothing but Gods promise for a new life, one that included children.

-Yes, Abraham obeyed God, but when things got tough in the new land, the one God sent him to, like not enough money or non at all! With the cost of living being so exorbitant, he did things his way and moved to Egypt. He resorted to hiding and lying. What in the world was this couple thinking?! Abraham put his beautiful wife in incredible danger. She was what? 65? What kind of organic products did Sarah use? Living in the harsh desert heat couldn't have been so good for her skin...yet she was beautiful. I wonder and am amazed that at 90 years old she was still turning heads of kings. What was her beauty routine like? I grumble about simply applying moisturizer. Her personal care mattered to her. Did Abraham think nothing serious would happen to her? Did she really believe she was helping him by agreeing to use her beauty to protect them? Did she imagine she was safe? Thank God for his mercy, he did protect her, despite their foolishness.

Gen 16:

Quite a few adventures happen and they prospered, but still had no children. Wanting a baby when you're young and not having one is like an impulsive nagging hurt that comes and goes. You want a baby, you worry you won't ever have one, you convince yourself that you're silly and you go on. Then, not having a baby when you're older is harder, but you hang on to faith and the promise, like Sarah did.

 (I Must do a disclaimer, that these are my speculations) Then Hagar, the beautiful fresh Egyptian slave girl came into her life. Sarah couldn't help but notice her youthful beauty and Abraham must have too 😕. Sarah, Abrahams soul mate, beautiful loyal Sarah was now older and tired of waiting. She allowed the circumstances of life to rule her actions. She knew her body was probably already too old to conceive a baby in her own womb and most likely so was Abraham. In an emotional state of confusion, after 10 years of waiting, Sarah suggested the unthinkable in marriage! Abraham complied, it seems like there was no hesitation on his part. Probably without warning, Hagar faced her old master and conceived. That seed that Sarah yearned for was in another woman. What ugly accusing regret Sarah must have felt. What betrayal.

Hagar is another confounding character in this story, thoughts for another post. Here I'll simple acknowledge that this young slave girl alone and away from her family, now had no respect or fear of her mistress, Sarah felt her disdain. It seems, perhaps it's my hope that Abraham never touched Hagar again, but out of this slave girl came Ishmael.

More than a decade passes before God remembered Sarah. By this point Sarah laughed at the idea that she could bare children, her faith had almost dried up.

Gen 20:

She’s still gorgeous! The bitter pain and inconsolable yearning in her soul did not destroyed her. And of course I wonder, how? How did she manage? She remained Abrahams faithful wife. At almost 90 years old her beauty has brought on Abrahams insecurities again. Her life is again in danger. Why did she keep quiet again? Maybe she just knew God would protect her? It is like that sometimes in life, somethings are easier to accept and believe than others. Isn’t it interesting that God plagues Abimelech with barrenness? I wonder if Sarah knew of this judgment?  Then…

Gen 21:

She conceived her promise child, her son Isaac. What did she feel aside from shock? She was granted the full experience motherhood. She felt the pleasure of nursing her baby and saw her husband cherish their promise child. Even the pain of teenage independence was an honor. The anxiousness for his future was unnecessary, but she embraced because it was part of motherhood also. 

Ah Sarah! What hope her life gives me.

Sarah's journey was not easy, she did make impulsive and damaging decisions. Things she would have to live with for the rest of her life. Through Sarahs journey I’ve seen, maybe what God saw in her. A faithful, beautiful daughter; a daughter of the King and a faithful, hopeful wife. How beautiful it feels to see just how much God loves his people. It is supernatural to have God on your side. He is patient and kind. His righteous judgments only bring healing. He turns our heaps of ashes into beauty. 

Clingy Moments

                                                           

                                         

 A person who is overly attached or emotionally dependent on another person can be described as clingy.   

A Burden 

This has a negative feeling. Am I overly attached and clingy? Have I allowed someone else to overly attach themselves to me? Clinginess can be burdensome at times.

There are times when we are either clinging to someone or someone is clinging to us. A painful or difficult circumstance that brings the load of clinging. The groan is felt, "Help me, pull me, even carry me, just for a little while until I can see and navigate on my own.

Clingy People

Have you considered that "clingy" has a positive side? It makes you feel needed. It makes you take your eyes off yourself. Someone clinging to us might mean they found in us a trustworthy friend.  

I’ve experienced a clingy parent. When my mother reached out to me in my brand new independence, wanting to keep me close, it repelled me, I was busy growing up. I couldn't see her need for assurance that I was ok. I didn't see that she thought her job was ending. And, neither of us realized that I would need her continually.

I’ve experienced a clingy sister who demanded friendship and all I could give her at times was sisterhood. But, thankfully when we clung to each other, friendship was eventually forged.

I’ve experienced a clingy friend, who's in a new place, calling out and holding fast to her place in my life. Sometimes the hold was so tight that it hurt. Eventually, when she released her tight hold, I clung to her. It is the cycle of true friendship.

I’ve experienced a clingy child, who cries only for mama and will not be comforted by another. Then in a blink of an eye they grow up and move on, leaving your nest empty and you listen for those "growing up" cries for help.

My Clingy Moments

I've clung to my husband and he's carried the load, the wife of his youth.

I've clung my children, not willing to let go. when I let go, my arms were free to hold my grandchild.

I've clung tight to my mother as I helped her along.

I've clung to my sisters, their time here was done and they had to go. I still cling to their memory and the hope that I'll see them again.

I've clung to my strong dad insisting that he acknowledge and approve me.

I've clung to my elderly father while he clung to his dignity and let go of strength.

I've clung to my dreams, praying they will turn to reality.

There comes a season in life's cycle that a turn on either side will come. Whether you are the clingy or the one  being clung to, God will give us strength, if you choose to cling to his promise in Isaiah 40: 29-31

He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

BRING ON THE WAIT!

 

 

 

Weight....Wait...more Weight...and Wait..... 

 

In the way of this culture I entered into marital bliss like a whirlwind. Although I was no longer working I was immediately a busy wife.  All the other roles still demanded some of me so I was busy juggling things and re-prioritizing.  My sister needed help with her new baby, my mothers health was poor and needed  her daughters attention. My best friend was getting married and at church the ministries I was committed to still needed me and now my husband and our marriage needed me.  Do you think I was gonna have time to pay attention to my weight? cuz you see, that's how I saw my weight dilemma; as a time consuming issue. 

Then, right in the middle of all my busyness I got a "fever"....not a terrible one, just a consuming one; "Baby Fever". The last thing on my list of concerns was my weight, I definitely stewed over my size...I did want a certain size.  Very soon I was "with child"  It was an incredible time.  4 weeks into pregnancy I was looking at myself sideways in the mirror looking for the "bump"  Any shreds of disciple or self control I was still clinging to went out the window.  I ate everything, all the time! I loved the weight gain! My belly was huge and I must confess, so was the backend.  In the last stretch of the pregnancy I was pretty tired, like all pregnant ladies ready to burst. I was feeling the baby weight and the extra weight.  In the end I had gained over 50lbs!  I never even flinched, well I flinched once when my husband came to an appt. with me and saw my weight. OUCH! His response was "jaw dropping to the ground" in astonishment. Then I flinched, and I retorted something like "its only baby weight".  He believed me and I believed me but the doctor knew better.  The only consolation or defense was that when our baby was born he weighed 10lbs 11oz.  Pretty big I'd say and so I consoled myself with that later.  Although later, when the weight didn't just fall off, you know like a towel dropping to the ground or when I couldn't just say "ok I'm done, I'll take this off now", like a heavy coat in a cozy room. It was a revelation to me pretty soon that I was gonna have to do something about the baby weight and the extra weight.  Oh how I longed for my "old average" size again.  I was overwhelmed at the extra weight on me and couldn't think of what to do.  I knew something had to be done.  Besides feeling uncomfortable I was also starting to feel insecure, like really insecure about what my husband and I looked like to other people.  That's when I developed this image of the "perfect 10" couple. He being thin would be the 1 and I being fat would be the 0. I was beginning to stress about get this extra weight off quick.

Well as much as I didn't want to do it, I had to, so I did.  I got on my second diet.  It was a shake diet.  Another fast losing tough diet.  And I did it, with exercise and dieting I lost all the weight, I had managed to shed the baby weight and the extra weight and I was back to my "thin average" size.  Of course my body was different now but I was looking pretty good.  Now my husband and I were gonna be odd 11. I was feeling pretty good cuz now I knew I just had to buckle down and diet and the weight would shed off in no time at all! For now I put away the shakes and relaxed with the exercise I was off restriction.